I have a prayer for my soon to be ex-husband. I want him to heal from his irrational thinking and anger. I want him to be come the father that he was ment to be for his children. I want to see him well.
Will I ever go back to him NO. I can NEVER take the chance that he will treat the children or I the way he treated us before. NO human should ever have to live through that. And especially not 2 times. Even if I see 100% healing I will NOT go back. Period.
He does seem to be healing some. He sent me a letter at one point saying he was sorry. There were 38 I'm Sorry. That was so sad to me. He knew the things he was doing was wrong. Yet he did them. He treated us like trash over and over and over again. And now after I have had enough he is sorry. His life is totally turned over. His life will never be the same. But me leaving him was the best thing I could have ever done for his relationship with his children. He actually pays attention to them and finds fun things to do with them the weekends he has them.
Would I like for him to just go away. Yes... But he will forever be a part of my life. Linked through our children. And since the youngest is 2 it will be along time before visitations bi-weekly will end. So for my children's sake I want to see God do an amazing healing to his brain. God is the miracle maker. He can do amazing things. And I want to see him well only for his children.
I'm curious why you think that he is mentally ill? What sort of a mental illness would it be? It seems, especially when you read that "sorry letter" that he is thinking quite clearly and knows full well what he has done and what the situation is. He doesn't seem irrational. Not criticizing, just wondering.
ReplyDeleteHi Lisa Beth,
ReplyDeleteI think he has some chemical imbalance because he would turn from the sane person to a totally evil person in a heart beat. I think I will edit that part to different wording though. His Grandpa committed suicide, His sister is diagnosed bi-polar and his mother has similar problems.
Thanks for the comment,
Christine
I see, Christine. Thanks for the clarification. :) I hope it is helping you to pour out your heart here.
ReplyDelete